It's come to this...

I mentioned that Kate has been unusually fussy lately. I did, in fact, spot her upper molars coming in. So that explains some of it. But not all.

She's started refusing diaper changes lately. She's never given me any hassle about changing her diaper before. But now, when I ask her to lay down for a diaper change, she'll sit right in front of me where she used to lay down, and scream if I try to get her to lay down. The only times she'll let me change it is when she is drinking a bottle or after bath time. So, the changes have been much less frequent. But when she has a messy diaper, what can you do? You have to change it! I don't want her getting diaper rash or anything.

You're probably thinking, "Just hold her down." Well, that's not as easy as it sounds. A 20+ pound baby is a lot stronger than I realized. Even if both Andrew and I are holding her down, it's really hard and the diaper is just thrown on as best we can. Besides, I don't want to spend the next year or so giving forced diaper changes. What to do?? I tried distracting her, of course, with animals and songs--nothin' doin'. So I pulled out two of her animals, asked them to lay down (which they did very obediently), and proceeded to change their diaper. Kate was fascinated and giggling and even clapped when it was over. Great! So I try again with Kate--yeah right--not happenin'!

Luckily, my sister is a "Love and Logic" instructor and always has great advice. Her kids are some of the nicest, most well-behaved kids I've ever seen--so I listen to what she has to say! For this, she recommended (if I wanted to try it) "holding therapy" where you just hold the kid (lovingly) and don't let them escape. You hold them for as long as it takes for them to settle down, and by the end it creates a bond between parent and child. She said that when she used it on her youngest, and she finally calmed down, she was stroking my sister's face and being super loving--amazing!

So I tried this. I'm so weak! After just a few minutes of thrashing and screaming (her--not me), I let go. After picking her up and trying over and over, she eventually got tired and laid down on her stomach. I had to change her diaper in that position--not easy! Especially because it was a messy diaper!

This has been going on for days. I decided that I would hold her again when she freaked out. So I tried again yesterday when she had a really stinky diaper that I wasn't going to let go for very long. I had enough time before church started that I could spend an hour holding her if it took that long to calm her down. She was just wearing a diaper because I had been in the process of changing her clothes, when she realized I was going to attempt a diaper change. And so it began. I held onto her tightly so she couldn't wriggle away (but not hurting her at all, obviously). She squirmed, pulled my hair, tried to bite me, etc. Her little head was covered in sweat. Her diaper had begun to loosen. She howled and raged. It was horrible! I began to worry and stress that Andrew's grandparents would think I was abusing her or something! 10 minutes of this passed. How long would this take?? 15 minutes....20...I finally let her go. She sat down in front of me on her blanket. Then I noticed that the poo juice was getting all over the blanket! Argh!

She was exhausted and laid down on her stomach again. I changed the nasty diaper upside down again and put her down for a nap. Afterwards, I was really distressed. I didn't have the stomach to do it for as long as it would take. The books my sister had read said that for the first time it will usually take a long time.

I was worried that she would need a diaper change at church and wondered what would happen. She ended up leaking pee out of her diaper and all over me (because I've been letting the time between changes stretch out due to the fight that ensues every time). I took her to the changing room and plopped her on the counter. She was so freaked out by being on the counter that she held perfectly still. Hmmm....the lightbulb went off in my head.

I didn't try it until just now, though! She had a messy diaper a few minutes ago and of course, started to freak when I picked her up. So, I took her into her room and put her up on her dresser. She froze! I quickly changed her diaper as she played with some stuffed animals. A miracle! I don't know if she'll always let me change her up there (if not, it'll be back to holding time--which I'm sure will eventually work if I could just hang tough)--but it gives me hope!

PS Woah--this is a LONG post. Thanks for making it this far (if you did).